A Man’s Guide to Wearing Jewelry

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A Man’s Guide to Wearing Jewelry

By James Hughes

I wear my wedding ring on my right hand.The reason? I married my wife in a Ukrainian Orthodox church and have never felt the need to move it even though we live in a country where 99.99% of people wear it on the left hand.My ring is a small silver metal band that maybe cost $20.  Nothing to brag about.  Yet it has been the subject of hundreds of conversations over the last 8 years because of its placement.That’s the power of jewelry–for better or worse it sends signals about who we are, what commitments we have made, and our status in society.   Step outside the norm and people notice.  Depending on your goals, this may be a good thing or a bad thing.The goal of this article is to help you understand the guidelines to wearing jewelry so you can better control the signals you send.  Because these tiny pieces of metal and stone can have a big effect on the opinions of people we’re trying to work with or get to know, you want to make sure you’re sending the right visual message.Please note – this is one man’s perspective.  I am aware that different cultures around the world view the wearing of jewelry differently.  I would love it if in the comments below you expand on your view of male jewelry and its role in your environment. 4 Rules for Men When Wearing Jewelrywearing jewelry
  1. Keep It Simple
When in doubt, keep it simple.  Start with a classic leather-strapped silver watch; if you regularly wear a watch and can afford it, consider a sportier diving watch with a stainless steel band as well.  Next branch out to tie accessories and cufflinks.Once you’re comfortable wearing these generally accepted pieces, then you can start to introduce other jewelry pieces like necklaces if you choose.  For a quick visual guide, visit Joe’s awesome chart over at Dappered.
  1. Match Metals
Most men’s jewelry is metallic.  Gold and silver tones are the most common.  Your outfits should only feature one metal tone at a time.
  • Gold is a warmer color and reads, predictably, like a yellow accent in terms of the color wheel.  It goes well with browns and other earth tones, as well as with deep hues like royal blue or hunter green.  Watch for differing tones if you’re buying multiple pieces of gold jewelry–gold comes in a broad range of darkness/lightness, and you may end up with pieces that don’t match if the difference is extreme.
  • Silver and silver-tone metals like polished stainless steel or chrome are neutral.  They read as grays, functionally outside the color wheel, falling instead on the black-to-white gradient.  That means they don’t clash too sharply with anything, but also don’t provide the same eye-catching contrasts that well-worn gold can.  Pair silver jewelry with black or dark gray clothing for a sleek, timeless look, or you can wear it with lighter colors in the summer without the fear of it overwhelming your clothing’s soft colors.
  • Copper and bronze are orange-hued metals and should be treated as such.  They’re bolder than gold or silver and need to be worn with restraint.  You’ll see copper-tone jewelry in more casual outfits, and an heirloom copper ring or shirt buttons/rivets can add to a plain trouser and shirt.
  • Precious stones need to be kept to a minimum.  They’re like purses–no matter how egalitarian you want to get about it, they’re still feminine to most.  A single color of stone on a ring or a single colored ear stud is the max.  Anything beyond that is either flaunting your wealth in an obnoxious way or just plain gaudy.
  • Turquoise gets a little bit of an exception for any man who wears deliberately Western styles.  It’s become something of a Southwestern gentleman’s stone.  A bit on a ring, bolo tie, or belt buckle goes great with jeans and a collared shirt.  Just be aware that it is a bright color and tends to be eye-catching–wear small amounts, and only when you want to draw attention to wherever the stone is located.
  • Leather is touchy for anyone who isn’t in high school or a rebel.  If you’re going to wear it, make sure it’s in natural earth-tones, not dyed black, and never with ostentatious metal studs.  Unless you ride a motorcycle, and even then, only when you’re actually riding the motorcycle.
  • Wood and bone are starting to show up more and more in men’s jewelry, often in reference to various ethnic traditions.  They’re usually on the paler end of the earth tones–take them case by case, and just be sure that you’re not wearing the jewelry right up against something that’s similar in color but not an exact match.  If you’re going to wear an unusual material like that, it needs to stand out a bit to really work.
The exception to issues of color matching are wedding bands and heirloom pieces. A man can always wear his wedding band; if it doesn’t go with your other metal pieces, don’t sweat it.  It’ll just draw a bit of attention, and there’s nothing wrong with having people notice the visible symbol of your commitment. As for heirloom pieces, try to match but assuming the piece is non-attention grabbing (such as a small ring or watch), the clash of metals is acceptable.If you’re going to be buying jewelry soon–make sure to first read my primer here on buying male jewelry where I explain metal and stone details in further depth.
  1. Understand Jewelry’s Symbolism
Jewelry has meaning.You can’t get away from this.  Despite it taking up only a tiny percent of your visual presentation, people zero in on jewelry thanks to its flash and uncommon usage by men.To further complicate the matter, people can interpret the meaning of the same piece of jewelry very differently.  To some, ornamental rings symbolize success and wealth; to others they signal organized crime affiliation.  Here’s a great discussion about this in the Art of Manliness’ community forum.That means a man has to be careful when wearing jewelry pieces outside the norm.  It’s easy to appear flashy when you start including nondescript jewelry in your daily getup.  However, jewelry can add a helpful bit of color and uniqueness to an outfit. So how does a well-dressed man balance it?
  • Avoid Ostentatious Styles. It’s hard to repeat this point often enough.  Keep anything metallic small and sleek.
  • Wear Meaningful Jewelry. We’ve talked about wedding rings already.  Other accents that have meaning might include a class ring, a fraternal insignia, a military service pin, or an athletic ring or necklace.  These can be “door openers and conversation starters;” if you’re talking to prospective business partners in Houston, it makes sense to wear your A&M class ring if you know they went to school in College Station.  If you’re interviewing artists for a gallery show in New York, perhaps heirloom cufflinks your uncle made can help display you care about art because you come from a family of artisans.  Choose jewelry that’s going to be meaningful within the situation.
  • Know When to Wear It. Save your best for the big occasions in life.  Personally I rarely wear any jewelry–despite being in the clothing industry I prefer simple pieces.  But when I have an important event to attend, I pull out my watch and cufflinks.  Bringing specific pieces out for specific events–instead of everyday wear–makes them less status pieces and more festive statements.
  1. Jewelry and Dress Codes
In the business world, company dress codes can severely restrict male jewelry.  Often phrased in a politically correct tone such as, “Men should only wear tasteful pieces of jewelry,” you’ll find in practice that this means not rocking the boat and conforming to the status quo. So if you’re hired at AT&T corporate, be careful about trying to wear as many necklaces as Mr. T.Seriously–the burden of appropriateness is always on the man who chooses to wear jewelry.  Know this and be restrained when you’re in any kind of professional setting.  You can express yourself after work.  Jewelry is, by its nature, small enough to slip into a jacket pocket after all.Businesses that request “modest” or “tasteful” or “appropriate” jewelry, or other words along those lines, prefer things be limited to the traditional “masculine” styles of jewelry.  This includes tie accents, watches, cuff-links, wedding bands, and lapel pins.  Over the last decade most companies have expanded this to include bracelets, earrings, and ethnic jewelry as well.Piercings (other than earrings) are dicey even in casual outfits.  If your office and social circles are comfortable with nose or lip piercings, that’s great, but it’s still going to seem off-putting to some strangers that you interact with–clerks at stores, taxi drivers, what have you.Unfair?  Absolutely, but that’s reality unless you live in a counter-culture friendly city like Austin, Boulder, or Portland.  If your goal is to appear well-dressed and trustworthy to most, look to stay within the bounds of accepted male styles.Written by Antonio CentenoCredit: The Art of Manliness

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